Unexpected Visitor

Today during meditation, my ex-husband decided to pay me a visit. Now, this has not happened for some time but I am not surprised he showed up.

See, he loved to control me, to manipulate me. And when it comes to feelings of unworthiness, he is my biggest cheerleader.

For so many years I allowed his projections to dictate how I FELT about myself. My self-worth took a tumble down a muddy, slippery, hill and it wasn't until I hit the bottom that I saw what had happened.

It has taken me over 2 years of pouring into my healing to get to the place I am now. A woman who is strong in her boundaries, leads with love and compassion. A woman who KNOWS her worth and who feels loved and supported everyday.

So when he showed up today, I was gentle and calm. I greeted him with kindness, but with a boundary that I was in control of myself, my feelings, my path - not him. He wasn't very happy with this - as I expected he would be. His soul has been so tormented that I know he grasps for control, through any means necessary. I expressed to him that I was no longer a means for him to gain control through. And that I was walking away no matter what.

He tried to grab my leg a few times to hold me down, each time I said, I will not stand here and fight with you. I am walking away. He would retreat, but would come back and try again. You have to give him credit for persistence.

But then something beautiful happened. I felt a strong presence standing beside me. It was quiet, calm, yet so strong. Like an ancient warrior. So masculine and ready to provide, but allowing me to handle my own. Waiting for me to ask for help. I touched his arm, thanked him for being next to me. For supporting me. For his faith that I can handle the situation.

And then my ex walked away.

I felt a deep rush of relief, of pride, of being fully supported. Of gratitude for my warrior to allow me to handle my own, but to be there for me in case I needed him. And it is my firm belief that we ALL deserve that! Gone are the days of shitty boundaries, being manipulated and scared. We are worthy of unconditional love!

Listen, I have had days where I didn't believe that, because of my situation. If this resonates with you, I would love to invite you into my private facebook community where we focus on everything self-love and healing! https://www.facebook.com/groups/gritandgracelifevip

I also have a beautiful offer of private coaching for you: https://docs.google.com/document/d/1T20je8yVBg9eHJjSKBFQJ-GDQNGDpYXbDY1Sv0HCqZU/edit?usp=sharing should you desire to go deeper!

***Now here is the weird thing. As I am writing this, my website shut down. As if there was a force who didn't want this message to be spoken, to be heard. But that isn't going to happen. Because I KNOW that I am not the only woman who has experienced a man's control. And that is so unfortunate.

Men are beautiful creatures, and I adore the shit out of them. I love them. Many are exactly like my handsome warrior, my soulmate. And unfortunately there are some that are so damaged by their traumas, so conditioned to manipulate and control that they are tornadoes of destruction. I pray for their souls. And I hope you will too.

Much love,